#alienate

hipstre@diasp.org

Everyone Has Stopped Talking To Me
It has taken many years, but everyone has stopped talking to me. I #alienate everyone because I am past helping. People like to think they can help you. They can't help me. I am past saving. I am a #fat, #worthless, piece of #human #garbage. I am down to one friend who will respond to me at all. #Therapists have no interest in me, as I don't have the money to buy their time, and I am past helping. I have been here many times before. I have to kill myself. It is what everyone wants. The most painful thing is to have little alert boxes and chat notifiers set up on social networking and other sites and types of software. And watch as people I have sent messages to, pop on the site, linger for an hour or two, and then disappear without acknowledging or replying to texts, messages, posts, or chats.

I know they saw my messages. They know that I know. They don't reply. After awhile, people just want you to kill yourself. But first they have to make sure that you know that you did this to yourself. And that they are the real victims here. But whatever. I don't blame anyone. I am a completely worthless piece of shit. Who cares? No one. This is your future. Unless you have children and warp their minds and hobble them, no one will care about you unless you pay them once you get old. And once you start paying people to "care" about you, you know what you are: a worthless sack of human fucking garbage.